Start Where You Are: See Your Life Clearly Take a Small Step

If you met me two decades ago, you would have seen a woman who was a little lost. I was constantly feeling as my life was on a treadmill: sitting at my kitchen table, coffee in hand, staring at a to-do list that seemed to have grown legs overnight. My life felt like a jigsaw puzzle with half the pieces missing. I wanted, well, just more. More joy, more purpose, more me, but I was stuck. I worried that the only solution was a massive life overall. Yet the actual solution was simply starting where I was and taking that first small step.

Maybe you know this feeling. You are craving change, but the idea of fixing everything at once is exhausting. It does not work that way. Life changes in small, brave steps. Tiny acts of noticing, naming, and choosing can make all the difference.

Awareness is the first step. It is not about judging your messy desk, your overflowing calendar, or the nagging feeling that you are not where you want to be. Awareness is sitting down with a trusted friend and saying, “Okay, let us look at this together.” It is gentle, honest, and it lights the spark that shows the way forward.

Small Step 1: Name Your Joy

Grab a notebook, a napkin, or even the back of a receipt. Write down one thing in your life right now that lights you up. Maybe it is your child’s giggle, the smell of rain on your morning walk, or a quiet moment with your favorite playlist. If you’re anything like me, you’ll likely find that the smallest of things give you a great amount of joy. From simply sitting with my morning coffee (screen free) to sitting on the patio as the sun sets light me up.

Small things truly do add up. And they matter. So, don’t overthink it. Tiny or slightly embarrassing joys count. Yes, binge-watching true crime counts. This is the place to be honest with yourself and maybe smirk a little. These sparks remind you who you are when everything else feels heavy. Even fleeting moments of joy are clues. They show you what feeds you and what you might be neglecting while racing through life.

Small Step 2: Notice the Heavy

Next, ask yourself: what feels heavy or out of sync? Maybe it is a commitment you dread, a cluttered corner of your home, or a worry that keeps looping in your head. It’s important to be honest and gentle.

Like the joys, I often find the small things add up to bigger frustrations. Things like saying yes to things that drained me. Or meetings that could have been emails. Or the way my messy closet made me lose time when I needed to get out of the house. Writing it down felt like exhaling.

Even if it feels like a small elephant is sitting on your shoulder, acknowledge it. Awareness is not about fixing it yet. It is about seeing it clearly and giving yourself permission to recognize it without judgment.

Sometimes the heavy stuff sneaks in quietly. It can be a pile of laundry that is staring at you accusingly or an unread email that makes your chest tighten. Calling it out by name is the first step toward lightening the load.

Small Step 3: Imagine a Small Shift

Now, dream a little. What is one tiny change that would make your day feel better? Think small: five minutes of stretching, a quick call to a friend, leaving your phone off for an hour, or sitting quietly and staring at the ceiling. No matter how many times I do this, those small shifts move mountains!

Other ideas could be starting the day with your journal rather than your phone. Doing the grocery shopping on Thursdays after work rather than Saturdays. Or ditching your old, worn-out (and uncomfortable) underwear for new undies. Your shift does not need to be dramatic. Think of it as a micro-heroic act that says, “I see you, self. I am here.” Even the smallest choice can remind you that you matter.

Sometimes it is the little things that have the biggest impact. A cup of tea without distraction, opening a window to breathe in fresh air, telling someone you love them before running out the door. These are not trivial. They are tiny acts of reclaiming yourself.

Try This in Your Journal

Grab your journal. Or a stack of 3×5 cards. Set a timer for 10 minutes:

- Name your joy
- Notice what feels heavy
- Imagine one small shift

Let it spill out, messy and unpolished. If emotions bubble up, let them. They are part of your truth. This is not about fixing everything. It is about beginning exactly where you are.

Write freely, scribble in the margin, laugh at yourself, be curious. This small practice can be the first ripple that leads to bigger waves.

No matter when I feel a little stagnant or overwhelmed, this works!

You’ll be surprised how taking just the next small step can dramatically shift your life. It’s a way to bust through the mental clutter, set aside all those shoulds, and create a plan for that next step forward. It’s also easier – and kinder – way to make changes that stick.

Small steps build momentum. Tiny victories matter. One small shift can change the tone of a whole day.

Ready to take a series of small steps?

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