Experts agree that intimacy is key to any healthy and strong long-term relationship. However, many people don’t understand what intimacy means. Intimacy is a type of closeness between two people, and while that closeness might translate into physical intimacy with one another, it also has an emotional component.
When a relationship lacks intimacy, it doesn’t mean the partners no longer love each other; it means there’s some sort of disconnect between them. Luckily, this can be repaired. Getting intimate with your partner means investing in emotional and physical intimacy, and sometimes one or both can be lacking in a relationship. Here are a few ways to improve intimacy with your partner:
One – Do Something New
Having a routine is good for people of all types, but your relationship can get too comfortable if you keep the same daily routine every day without doing something new because you know what to expect. In a relationship, routine offers security but can also make both partners bored. Stepping out of your comfort zones and trying something new, no matter what it is, can improve intimacy.
Trying something new doesn’t mean something in the bedroom either; it can mean a new activity, like learning new skills together or going to a new place. But, of course, you can try something new in the bedroom because whatever you decide to do is up to you and your partner. Trying something new together, especially if it’s something neither of you has done, can reinvigorate your relationship while providing lasting memories.
Two – Discuss the Past
Reminiscing is also good for relationships because it reminds both of you about the best parts of your relationship. When you discuss past fun experiences, it will remind you of how good your relationship is. You can even try to recapture some of those feelings by doing the same things again. For example, if you had a good time at a fair, you can go back to the fair and have another great time.
Three – Touch
Physical connection is important to helping you stay connected emotionally to your partner. Affectionately touching your partner offers benefits and can be relaxing. For example, cuddling can help you form strong attachments to your partner while decreasing your blood pressure and increasing oxytocin. Even something as simple as holding hands on a walk can emotionally impact your relationship.
Four – Schedule Physical Intimacy
Sex is important in relationships. Of course, it’s not the most important factor, but it can increase the closeness you feel to your partner. Scheduling sex may not seem as exciting as when you’re both randomly in the mood throughout the day, but it can ensure the physical needs of both partners are met, especially if one or both of you struggle with getting into the mood. Let’s face it; sometimes you crawl into bed after a long stressful day, and all you want to do is sleep. However, if you schedule sex with your partner and have open conversations about the struggles you and your partner face, for example, erectile dysfunction, you can improve your connection and make sex part of the routine.
Scheduling intimacy also builds anticipation and lets both partners properly prepare so they can feel their most confident selves helping to reduce any anxiety you and your partner may have in the bedroom. In addition, scheduled sex can promote more spontaneous sex.
Five – Connect Throughout the Day
Staying connected with your partner throughout the day via texts or little notes can help them remember that they matter to you and you’re thinking of them. Checking in with one another is a great way to show someone how much you care. Of course, you shouldn’t check in so much that your partner feels smothered, but a few texts while you’re not with them can improve their day.
Six – Show Appreciation
Showing your partner appreciation can improve your relationship in many ways. For example, when someone feels appreciated by their partner for doing the daily chores can improve intimacy. Of course, you should always be specific and compliment them freely and naturally throughout the day.
Seven – Date Each Other
You may forget to go on dates when you’ve been in a relationship for a while and live together. However, dating is important in relationships, no matter how long you’ve been together because it allows you to get out of the house and focus on spending quality time together.
Eight – Support Each Other
Support is important because sometimes your partner will need you. If your loved one asks for help, try to help them to the best of your ability. Partners can become overwhelmed, especially with kids and other responsibilities. For example, if one partner isn’t helping with chores or taking care of the children, it can take a toll on the other. Therefore, it’s important for both partners to support each other to relieve some of the stress associated with everyday life.
Nine – Eliminate Distractions
When you’re not distracted by chores, other distractions in your life can prevent you from spending quality time with your loved one. The biggest issue for many couples is that they’re distracted by their cell phones. Believe it or not, your relationship could suffer because of social media, especially if you spend too much time on your phone and don’t pay enough attention to your partner.
Schedule quality time together without distractions, especially cell phones, to ensure your partner feels like you’re truly listening to them when they talk. If you’re scrolling social media and your partner starts talking to you, put your phone down so you can actively listen to what they’re saying.
Ten – Consider Counseling
Sometimes couples fight or people make mistakes in their relationship. However, if two people are willing to put in the work, any relationship can recover. Couples counseling can improve your relationship by helping you learn how to connect with your loved one and listen to one another. Counseling offers a safe space for couples to talk to one another about issues they may not want to talk about by themselves and having a professional to get the conversation started can help couples discuss the harder parts of being in a relationship.
Improving intimacy with your partner may take time and dedication. Intimacy is not something you naturally have with someone; instead, you must dedicate time to your partner and your relationship to form stronger bonds and create a long-lasting connection.