I believe that confession is good for the soul, so here’s a personal confession: I have some big goals this year around my writing, yet the first quarter of 2013 was spent with me being a gypsy.
Now, while I have a gypsy soul when it comes to the exploration of my deepest desires via travel, being a gypsy is not a way to be productive when it comes to writing. On any given day, you would find me and my laptop in various places around the house. Sometimes, at the island in the kitchen. Sometimes on the couch (where the temptation of the TV would call to me). Rarely would you find me in the office. I wandered around the house, never setting up shop anywhere for too long.
My gypsy writing was having an adverse effect on my productivity.
Why was I giving into gypsy working? To be flat out honest: my wants were scaring me and baby, there was all kinds of resistance. Every person on “Team Debra” was telling me that I needed to write. That what I have conceptualized is meant to be born into this world. And when I planted those beautiful seeds in January, all kinds of dirt came up.
It never fails, darling, that when you plant a seed, the first thing that surfaces is the dirt the new sprout is displacing.
Here’s the truth, darling: sometimes, we get in our own way. Sometimes, we do everything in our power to distract ourselves from what we most desire. Sometimes, we plant these beautiful seeds of dreams and desires, and get stuck in the dirt for a bit.
So, what’s a gal to do when she’s stuck in the dirt?
The very first thing to do – every damned time – is to just be honest with ourselves and acknowledge it. Then, the next step is to stop beating yourself up and accept it’s where you are today, but it doesn’t mean it’s where you’re going to stay.
It’s time to get curious and ask yourself some questions:
- How long are you going to stay in the dirt?
- What are you going to do to get out of the dirt?
- What do you need in order for life to be congruent with your goals? What is not happening so that you can be congruent with who you want to be?
I based my decision of “how long” on my calendar. We had a trip to Copenhagen planned, so I chose a week after returning home as the appropriate time frame for me. There is a magical connection to giving yourself a deadline.
As to how I was going to get out of the dirt, I decided to get super curious and experiment. What was my ideal environment for productive writing? I wrote all over the house, in cafés, and at my desk. I got curious about how I felt in each place both upon beginning and ending my writing time each day.
Then came that truly important third question: what did I need in order to be congruent with my goals and who I want to be in this world. What I discovered was that while I loved being mobile, there is a huge difference from being mobile and being a gypsy.
So, here’s the deal, kitten: Writing is how I deliver my message. Writing is how I convey to readers tips, tricks, and my opinion on ways to create a life you love. Writing is how I create the lessons for all of my 30 Days to Clarity courses as well the Make Your Inner Sex Kitten Roar immersion.
The bigger picture of why I need to not be a gypsy during my writing time is bigger than a single writing project.
What I need in order to be the write the volume of words a week – and the quality I desire is a consistent work space. I need my tools at hand. I need quiet. I need uncluttered. My environment in addition to my routines and habits all need to be congruent with who I am – and who I want to be.
At this point, you may be asking what the hell does this have to do with me?
What it has to do with you, darling, is everything.
Are you always putting yourself last? Do you tell yourself that it’s ok disappoint yourself? Are you tired all the damned time? Are you running a race like there’s a finish line somewhere, but you never get “there”? Do mornings feel like you are racing against an approaching storm? Do you feel disconnected to your dreams? Are you surrounded by piles of clutter because life is too busy to get organized?
Your surroundings are like the soil in which the seed is planted. They can support your expansion, or keep you tied to old habits and patterns.
Your habits and routines aren’t random parts of your day, they are what creates your day to day life.
Your rituals – or lack thereof – are what tells your soul how you feel about yourself.
Your resistance to creating change in your life is crippling you. Your crazy busy life is like me being a gypsy – it isn’t propelling you towards your dreams, it’s keeping you from them. Your refusal to ask for help is only adding stress.
In order to create a life you love, you must cultivate an environment that encourages you.
That means, clearing the clutter from your space, from you mind, and from your schedule.
If you want to create change – to feel loved, to feel worthy – then it’s time to show yourself love by taking care of yourself.
You do this by applying some loving discipline to your world with habits that support you, routines that nourish you and rituals that connect you to your soul.
Like it was time for me to return my laptop to my desk, it’s time, darling, to begin making your life congruent with what you want to create in the world and who you want to be.
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Hey Girl…
You’ve written an interesting post and something that reflects an old intuition of mine. You wouldn’t know it from my home workspace, but I prefer tidy because it helps me when I’m working (whatever that work might be). So your point about your workspace resonates.
I suppose that means I’ll have to tidy my workspace this weekend. I was meaning to anyway. My duty will mostly be stowing the items staged for eBay sales plus putting away a few lenses that migrated to my worktable. 🙂
I’ve been tempted a few times to “go walkabout” for a few months or a year. I need to finish Neil Peart’s “Ghost Rider” (set aside because it’s a hard read). Also, it seems you’ve been reading Pressfield, who is recommended if you don’t know his work.
The pin-up girls you choose for illustrations amuse me, by the way. You’re politically incorrect and I love it.
Well done. I suppose that’s all a random ruminator should say.
You are welcome to as much space as you want – any time here.
My desk is this anthropological barometer of where I am in the creation process.
The more I resist creating, the more stacks you will see. Stacks of mail. Stacks of books. Stacks of client reviews. And the return of a trip means that everything from the trip (electrical adapters, camera charger, brochures) are there as well. It’s as if I am allowing my “stuff” to create a barrier between me and my desk.
When I am deep in a creative mode, it gets disorderly and messy. I have note cards – with both my schedule and my notes that my writing brings to mind, books with bookmarks, pens, folders, business cards, and brochures scattered across the desk – and underneath the desk, there are shoes – sometimes two or three pair that have made their way onto my feet at various points of the day. If you ever walk into my office and see this, I’ve been quite productive. I also have this deep window in the office with a 14 inch will that is perfect for the overflow 😉 It may stay this way for days.
Then comes the day when the disorder becomes too stack-like and it’s time to start fresh – I file everything away, put all the stray pens in the pen holder, and pull out the furniture polish. This happens about once a week and I prefer to leave my desk this way on a Friday (though sometimes, it’s a Monday).
Despite the fact that I don’t produce the volume of words when I’m traveling as I do when I’m at home, I find the observations and notes are keen and I discover these nuggets of fact and truth. This is when I get these huge “ah-ha” moments, and I have learned that I must record them or I lose them.
You are indeed correct on the influence of Pressfield – the War of Art, Turning Pro and Do The Work – are all on my reference shelf – they are sandwiched between David Allen (Getting Things Done) and Benjamin Hoff (The Tao of Pooh). I have bookshelves in the basement, but the books in my office are the ones I refer to all the time. (I’ll take a picture and post it on FB).
Ah….and my Pin Up Girls. I don’t care that they aren’t politically correct. It’s a homage to the Tarnished Southern Belle in me. They are all – girl-next-door / sex-kitten that reflects me and how I approach the world…. and my coaching is the same way – supportive, loving, yet sometimes, it’s raw and primal because I know that’s where the meat of the matter is.
If someone is offended by the Pin Ups, then we wouldn’t be a good fit as coach and client.
Thank you, dear, for causing me to ruminate a bit deeper!
I find my workspace reflects my degree of distraction. I prefer to tidy up once I’m done for my day. Then I start out the day without having to find space to put my journal, coffeecup, and elbows. 🙂
When my workspace is cluttered, it reflects the clutter of my mind. (My home workspace is quite cluttered at the moment.) Sometimes the clutter accumulates when I’m processing a large project that has many physical components (as I am right now). But, once the project climaxes I stow things.
I’m out of storage for my burgeoning collection of vintage manual focus camera lenses. I suppose that means I need to look hard at my shelves to determine what needs to move out so my lenses have a place to stay. They are being used fairly often so I prefer to keep them handy.
The other things simply need to be put away.
BTW, that reminded me of something I meant to mention. Are you aware of Hugh McLeod? (Gaping Void Art) His bits are interesting and often stimulating. Yesterday’s email contained a cartoon that smacked me upside the head. I printed a copy and put it in my journal entry for the day. The caption is “The dream had vanished. Unfortunately, the lifestyle remained.” His work is recommended if you haven’t discovered it.
David Allen is a favorite of mine as well. I use his system and recommend it to others. It requires a bit of work to get started, but not so much to maintain.
I love the pin-up girls. They are a nice touch — classy and classic.
You know, it’s been ages since I’ve checked in on Hugh (we interviewed him for All Things Girl a couple of years ago). I’ll have to look him up again.
I use a big chunk of David Allen’s system still. He’s a big influence on my Clutter Busting course (managing paper) and Clearing Brain Clutter course (Brain Dump!). I often refer to him, too, when clients are super busy but need to be better organized.